Ever wondered how rapidly we grow up? Life just flows like a perennial stream. From being an innocent kid to a rebellious teen and suddenly you are just thrust into the real world just like that. Whatever you say is being watched and interpreted into multiple meanings. Suddenly your actions count a lot more than they did before.
And right at that time, it strikes u like a bolt. You feel like "Hey cmon, am no more a kid am i? I should act mature and responsible".
And you just make up your mind to act all stern and serious and worked up in the name of maturity. This is quite a dangerous shift because you could lose yourself in this process. Now am not suggesting that your gonna die or something. What i mean to say is that in the anxiety of growing up and getting matured, we could lose our individuality, our real self takes a back seat while the unreal mature act we put up takes over.
It is important to grow up and be responsible but it is much more important to grow up gradually rather than just barging into adulthood.
Earlier when i was a little boy, i always used to wonder when i would grow up older like my father and i had a reason to feel so.
My father, all of his 6 foot height, was the master and commander of our house. He acted with such superiority and had an air of invinciblity that made me breathless at times. What he willed happened. Whatever be the issue, his opinion was the final say.
He was my first and best Superhero!
And i was like "Wow! this is what getting old gives you, awesome!"(like always, i realised in future how wrong my notion was)
Some of the other trivial reasons that made me envious of my father were
1. He didnt have to do homework.
2. My mother didnt dare pester him like she pestered me.
3. He had his own bike to go to his workplace while i slogged it out to school in a worn out rickshaw which must have been declared obsolete in the 18th century.
4.He had complete control over the T.V and its various crap.
5. And he didnt have any PTA meetings and didnt have to face the music from any of my stern looking teachers.
I thought if i guy doesnt have any of the above problems, what more could he ask for?
He must be bloody lucky!
U cannot blame me can you? I was 9 yrs old and my life comprised of tv, cartoons, playing in the terrace,dislike for homework and a fear for dogs and teachers. I thought that was life and my problems were the worst one could ever get. I hated my life at that time. How i wish i could back to it now with my mother and my father to protect me like a priceless jewel.....
And then came the most interesting period of everyone's life(i can bet u that).
The TEENS
Just writing the word Teens gives me a fluttering happiness , imagine how happy i wouldve been at that time.
Its just a beautiful phase , a phase where we find our likes, our dislikes, our pals, our own world comprising the best of our choices, the distinct phase where we find a magical attraction towards the opposite sex,the crushes, the competetion, the pressure , the sacrifices, the fun and the laughter. And in the process we find ourselves, our individuality.
Its a phase which has the power to either shape or disfigure our future. It has its good times and bad times but neverthless everybody enjoys it and would want to relive it altogether.
Here, unfortunately, i started sensing a gradual increase of hostility and rebelliousness towards my parents and the elders.
I started questioning a lot, broke all kinds of rules , rebuked my elders and made quite a reputation for my name.
I was caught up in spider's tangle of growing individuality and protective parents, unable to sacrifice either of them and am sure everyone goes through this in their life.
Suddenly my father looked like my worst supervillain unlike my childhood years. I answered him back word to word and dared him to do whatever he pleased (it mustve been a funny sight, me daring my father who was heads and shoulders above me at dat time).
At this time entered my angelic mother who had more patience and a sense of calmness than an acclaimed saint. She was the bridge between us, the one who made my path easier and less destructive:)
And then came the girls(who i say must be pampered like anything:)) who i always adored and respected for their beauty, dignity and their immense ability to listen and understand which we boys can hardly imitate let alone master.
Crushes were too many, would have to write a seperate post for my crushes and their pitiable conclusions:)
But i would strictly owe my sanity during teenage, to all my girlfriends(or take is as girls who were friends if your too conservative to swallow the above statements)
During the last phase of my teens ie : college, i found my true friends, laid the foundation for lifelong relationships and companionship.
And one fine day, suddenly everything got over, the college, the friends, the fun. I was like "What the heck?"
Then came my father who told me coolly "GET A JOB SON"
I was shocked to say the least. But i had to move on.
With uncertainity and doubt i entered the real world, the corporate world with its concrete and steel shining buildings, where men are treated as resources, with executives who wore ties like a noose, where every bloody moment of yours is been tracked and your slightest action held accountable, men with serious looks on their faces and an addiction towards deadlines, where bosses hardly showed an emotion. And i could here my inner voice telling me "Welcome kid, to ur beloved OFFICE"
And i thought " Was i jumping up and down since childhood to get to this hell hole? It cant be. Its all just a nightmare(my colleague nudged me in my shoulder to prove that it was not).
And this is what my father was going through all these years, and i thought he was the luckiest guy in the planet. It was tragic. I just wanted to run away far far from that concrete jungle, i wanted the warmth of my college, the excitement of my school, the security of my childhood...then it struck me how ironical it was.
Perplexed, i went to my father who asked me to fight on with determination and grow up in life. He thought me the importance of patience, the nescessity to struggle, the respect a job gives to a man.
And for once i heard him and followed his words which made me realise the value of his words.
I realised that there was no perfect place which never had any bottlenecks and to struggle is to survive and survival is nescessary for happiness
I had arrived.
And when i recieved my first salary and went to see my father i could sense him telling me
"Now you are a MAN MY SON"
